THE RV NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the land
RVers were sleeping in their great big tin cans.


The stockings were hung by the fridge with great care
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.


The children were nestled all snug in their beds
While memories of family trips danced in their heads.


And Pa in his sweater and I in my shorts
Were watching TV – a show of some sorts.


When out in our campsite there arose such a clatter,
I sprung from the gaucho to see what’s the matter.


To the window I flew, heart full of fear.
I pulled up the blinds to see what was near.
Then what to my wondering eyes did appear,
But a giant red sleigh and a bunch of reindeer!


When I saw the driver I realized real quick
This must be the ever so famous St. Nick!


Faster than Dodge Dualies his coursers did tow,
And no hint of sway, not even in snow!
He looked at his team and started to bellow.
He had a loud voice, this Santa Claus fellow!


"Now Dasher, now Dancer, now Prancer and Vixen,
On Comet, on Cupid, on Donder and Blitzen!
To the roof of that trailer, to the top of them all,
Dash away, dash away, dash away all!"


So up on my trailer those reindeer, they flew!
With a sleigh full of toys and St. Nicholas, too.


Then, in a twinkling, up on my roof,
I heard the prancing of all those big hooves!
"The roof will cave in, we’re all going to die!"
 I thought of insurance and started to cry.


I got it together and was turning around,
When from the bathroom there came a strange sound.
A thumping came out of the toilet that night,
Old Santa had come down the wrong darn vent pipe!
I opened the dump valve and out Santa came,
Covered with substances I don’t care to name.


With a wink of his eye and a nod of his head,
He was magically cleaned – there was nothing to dread.
A bundle of toys he had with him, cinched tight.
He looked just like my husband on laundry night.


He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
He filled all our stockings, and turned with a jerk.
Then turning the crank while standing on his toes,
He gathered himself up and out the roof vent he rose.


He jumped in his sleigh, to his team gave a holler,
And away they all flew – just like RVing dollars!
But I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

HO HO HO! MERRY CHRISTMAS Y'ALL!
Wherever you may be.

Connie and Rod